Depression and a tooth

The depression hit hard again last week. I was planning to go to the gym, and when simply imagining changing to prepare for exercise, I had the most morbid thoughts and I kept shuddering inside. Had to do with self harm rather than harming other people in the changing room, but it put me off enough that I ended up slinking over Vivocity and spending 20 bucks on dinner. And of course, crashing down in my mood.

But looking back on it, it was just nice to sit and watch the world go by. Maybe I need to do that just a little bit more.

So, back on meds again for a short while. Another 10 days worth.

In other news, I had my wisdom tooth out today. It was growing straight down and grinding on my lower molar. Woke me up sometimes at night. So out it goes. Made an appointment at the National Dental Center near my place. I had another tooth filled in as well (got a scare when the dentist patiently told me that it was decaying and we needed to get the decay out AND if the decay was too deep, we’d have to do a root canal. “Do you know what a root canal treatment involves?” I only knew it goes real deep, and I don’t want one. Anyway as it turns out, a root canal treatment involves taking out the nerve under a tooth and replacing it with a root canal as the decay would already be too deep and affect the nerve. And I didn’t need one. Thank you God.) and then had my wisdom tooth taken out. It was HUGE. I’m keeping it because I can’t believe how big it is. Maybe I’ll post a picture some day.

And now the anesthetic has totally worn off, I’m kicking myself for being so gung ho as to tell the doctor (they’re all doctors – just for teeth, that’s all) that I didn’t need the MC after all. Stupid stupid. But work demands are high lah.

Back to work with a wince… and praying hard the depression ends.